Out on the Net

Title:  Author:  Rick R. Reed
Publisher:  Genre: Contemporary M/M, Romantic Comedy
Length: Novella, (18K words, 80 PDF pages)
Rating: 4.75 stars out of 5

Summary Review: A funny and delightful tale about one man’s search for love in mostly the wrong places but he finds it in the most unlikely place of all, Homo Depot.

THE BLURB

Ray Tolliver has bad timing. Cold feet? It doesn’t get much worse than accepting you’re gay twenty minutes before your wedding to a woman, yet that’s just what happens.

Join Ray as he recounts in his blog the hilarious and touching events that lead him on a journey toward true love. Although he originally starts looking for love in all the wrong places, will he eventually find another man who wants more than just quick sex? A man who appreciates romance, hearts, and flowers? Or will he find that self-acceptance and bliss do not always go hand-in-hand?

And what of Alice, Ray’s lovely, jilted fiancée? Will she find it in her heart to forgive the man who left her at the altar?

These questions and more are answered in this unique love story, told in the form of blog entries. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, but you’ll come away with a renewed appreciation for the power and difficulties of loving not only others, but yourself…

THE REVIEW

Rick R. Reed has a gift for you – his latest book, Out On The Net. I think I’m in love with Rick after reading this book which had me cracking up, laughing so loudly I’m surprised that my neighbours didn’t complain last night. I was feeling really down and thought I would flip through the book before going to sleep. Well, you know what happened. I couldn’t put the darn book down. I thought that the funniest story Rick Reed had ever written was Man-Amorphosis almost 2 years ago which is a very short book with an original concept. It’s pretty easy to maintain the humour level when it’s only 5K – that story was side splittingly funny and if you haven’t read it you are missing a rare treat. Out on the Net is a novella and I am serious when I tell you that you need to read this book. The master of horror has outdone himself by making fun of every gay cliche´ as we travel with Ray Tolliver in his first person account of his ride to gaytopia and love.

Out on the Net starts off with our thirty year old groom-to-be a few minutes before he’s about to be married to his fiancée Alice, as he’s standing in the little room just off the altar at St. Alfonso Catholic Church in Summitville, PA on a hot and humid July afternoon. He was wearing a white tuxedo jacket, white shirt, black tie and cummerbund, and black tuxedo slacks (typical wedding attire), listening to a string quartet playing Beethoven’s “Ode to Joy” so gorgeously it brought tears to his eyes – when it hit him! He had been fooling himself about his sexuality all along and he could not go through with this farce of a wedding to a woman, because he was gay. How did he know he was gay when he’s never been with a man? Well, “how do you know you’re straight?” is his answer to that question.  He just knows, and the rest of the book is his adventure to first, find a  man he could care about and second, get his cherry popped – not necessarily in that order. 🙂

Ray decides to take his search for the man of his dreams to, where else – the Internet, via a blog, in which he recounts in gory detail everything that happens along the way to love and togetherness. If you want to find out what it’s like to be a newly minted gay man with no idea of what gay men do, where they hang out, gayspeak (e.g. he had no idea what corn holing was), where to find a man to date, and all the things every gay man needs to know as he ventures into a new world, you have come to the right place. Obviously Rick Reed wrote this story tongue firmly planted in his cheek or wherever 🙂 since any man, gay or straight, knows where to find gay porn sites on the Internet if he really wants to.

His first outing is at an infamous rest stop outside his little town called Lollipop Park for obvious reasons, and after sitting in his car for a while one evening with no action, he wandered into the restroom where he met a man who had what his mom used to refer to as “summer teeth.” Some are here. Some are there.” Here’s a little teaser from the book:

He reached for my crotch, as if to give it a neighborly squeeze. I swung my legs around to ensure his intended was out of his reach. He sighed impatiently and ducked quickly into the stall next to mine.

For a long time, there was silence and I dared not hazard a peek through the hole in the wall to see what my new buddy was up to. But finally, I could stand the suspense no longer. I leaned forward a little, positioning my eye so it was level with the hole. Boy, did I get an eyeful. Mr. Summer Teeth had had no compunction about dropping his drawers and working himself up into a frenzy. A huge cock, what I would estimate to be between eight or nine inches, rose up from between his tanned thighs. He worked it hard and there was a drop of precum poised at the slit in his head. I have to admit it. My mouth wasn’t so dry anymore.

I watched. I think I was a little in shock. All kinds of things were running through me, making me feel both nauseous and lustful. I wanted that thing. I needed to get the hell out of here now. He must have noticed me peering through the hole because the next thing I knew that big missile was coming right through it. Hey, buddy, watch it! You could take out someone’s eye with that thing!

Suddenly the cock was right in front of my face ………..

This author is so talented that he blows me away, but when I was reading this book I wondered why comedies don’t get any respect. Is it because we don’t think they require as much talent and writing skill, or do we look down on romantic comedies and don’t think they should be rated as highly as the “serious stuff”? It takes more writing skill to make someone laugh than cry – just ask any comedian who has ever told a joke to dead air. This book is so full of double entendres and one liners that I would need to write a review at least twice as long to give you some of the flavour. 

Ray’s characterization was superb and the plot moved along smoothly, which was what I expected from this author.

I learned a lot from this book including the fact that Corn Huskers lotion from Walmart did the job just as well as any high end lube, 🙂 and I always suspected this but Ray confirmed it, “a man can only think with one head at a time.” Who knew? LOL Out on the Net was hilarious and our hero did find love eventually, so he had his HEA.

You’ve seen the ads in public bathrooms, “for a good time call ….” followed by a phone number? Well for a good time, I recommend that you get Out on the Net.